If I'm honest, I'll admit that deep down I believe that if my life is difficult it means I'm being punished. At the very least, I believe God is trying to teach me some lesson. If I can just learn the lesson, the suffering will stop. 2 Corinthians 11 and 12 make it very clear that Paul suffered A LOT. However, I don't think that god was punishing Paul. Three times he asked God to take away the thorn in his flesh, and God said, "No." God told Paul that His grace is sufficient.
On this first Sunday of Advent, the traditional HOPE Sunday, I choose to believe that God's grace truly is enough for me.
No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From a life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Could ever pluck me from His hand
'Til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I stand
"When the Going Gets Tough"
http://www.gracechurchnwa.org/gracecast
I feel the same way, Monica. Deep down inside, I also feel like if I'm good enough, God will give me what I want. I guess that means I think I can manipulate God. I don't want to believe this way...and I'm really trying hard to take every thought captive. Baby steps, sister!
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